Jackson Medallion Bag Tag

Description

If you are tired of these MF’n delays on this MF’n flight, congratulations. You have reached Jackson Medallion status.

The Jackson Medallion is an airline loyalty parody inspired by the timeless truth that flying will test your patience, your sanity, and your ability not to yell at strangers in a boarding group vest. You have one goal. Get on the plane. Get off the plane. No surprises. No nonsense. No snakes.

Clip this onto your luggage and let the entire airport know exactly what kind of flight you are here for. Some people will laugh instantly. Some will freeze. A few will quote the line out loud and keep it moving.

Printed in full color on both sides of a durable PVC card and paired with a flexible plastic loop, this tag is built to survive real travel, real overhead bins, and real situations where you are absolutely done.

Details
– Size: 3.375 in x 2.125 in
– Full color, double sided print
– Durable PVC card, ID style thickness
– Includes clear plastic luggage loop

What it does
– Makes your bag impossible to miss
– Warns everyone within eyesight
– Communicates your tolerance level before boarding

What it does not do
– Remove snakes from planes
– Fix delays, cancellations, or gate changes
– Stop you from dropping F-bombs

This is a parody item. It is not affiliated with any airline, movie studio, or loyalty program. It will not get you upgraded. It will not calm you down. It will simply speak the truth you are already thinking.

Perfect for frequent flyers, movie quote legends, and anyone who has had it with these MF’n snakes on this MF’n plane.